


The Tales of Those who have Left Us

by Balthazar_Here



Category: Supernatural
Genre: And I hope you guys like it, Angelcest, Bro stuff, F/M, Fluff and Angst, I wrote this on Wattpad at first then wrote it here too, I'm sorry for the OC I just love her, Other, This is my first thing on here, so hi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-02-26
Updated: 2016-02-27
Packaged: 2018-05-23 10:08:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6113206
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Balthazar_Here/pseuds/Balthazar_Here
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>These are the stories of the Angels that were disgraced- in their own ways.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Betrayal: Lucifer

He was the Brightest. The most Beautiful. His Father's favorite. Although him and his twin bickered

and fought often, he was happy.

"Lucifer, no." Michael repeated himself.

"It is for Gabriel, not I," Lucifer sighed, holding the cloud closer to chest. "You know how much he loves them."

"Yes, yes, I know, yet I cannot permit you to take it to him."

"Luci! Luci! Is it a cloud, is it a cloud?" Gabriel tried to fly over, but his fledgling wings were too weak, so he toddled over on his little legs.

"Yes, Gabriel, it is." Lucifer leaned down and gently handed his younger brother the fluffy condensation of water. Gabriel thanked him with a wide smile and threw the cloud into the air, flapping his wings to raise himself a few inches up and catch it again.

"Lucifer!" Michael cried out.

"He enjoys it." Lucifer responded, stroking his brother's blond- brown hair.

"And? That is no reason to spoil him!"

"Letting him play is spoiling him?" Lucifer asked incredulously, glaring up at his brother, whose peacock wings were spread menacingly, fists clenched at his sides. Michael then raised his head proudly, vanishing, unable to argue any longer.

"Luci?" Lucifer sat and let the little archangel curl into his lap. "Why do you and Mike fight so much?" Lucifer sighed at Gabriel's question.

"We have different ideas."

"Do you love Mike?"

"Of course I do, Gabriel. And he loves me as well. Our fighting does not mean we are enemies."

"Are you and Michael going to kill each other?"

"Father- No, Gabriel. I never want to kill him."

"Oh." Gabriel stayed quiet after that, until another fledgling approached, Gadreel.

"Lucifer! Gabriel! Father is making a new archangel!" Lucifer was surprised. Gabriel was still very young, and Raphael was in Michael's care, Gabriel in his. That meant the new fledgling would have to choose. Odd, this idea of free will.

The new archangel's name was Sariel. A small, almost weak- looking girl with bright orange- gold hair and wide, curious blue eyes. This was not her true form, of course. Father said He preferred His angels to take the appearance of their "first vessel". None knew what that meant, but Sariel seemed wiser than her age. Nearly always silent and solemn, she did not play with the others unless it was play- fighting where she'd easily beat the older ones. She seemed to gravitate to Lucifer's laid- back attitude and quietness rather than Michael's aggressiveness; however, she adored the fighting. She'd watch and fight with bright eyes and a wide smile. Once, when Lucifer and Michael fought, Lucifer had beaten his brother black, red, and blue. Sariel had analyzed every second, and when Michael left to tend to his wounds, she'd jumped up and hugged Lucifer, saying how proud she was of him, how strong and powerful and wonderful he was.

Gabriel was becoming older, he preferred to be alone, practicing the magic Lucifer taught him, so Lucifer found himself spending more and more time with the newest archangel. The aspect of her adoring anger and fights scared him, but thought she made up for it in her ability to peacefully watch the world go by below, laying on her stomach and studying Father's creations. She asked him questions every so often, but mostly kept to herself. Despite his worries, Sariel quickly became Lucifer's favorite, and he hers.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

"Lucifer?"

"Yes, Sariel?"

"Why does Raphael not like me?" Time had passed, and Gabriel was now full- grown, still isolated by choice from the rest of his siblings. Sariel had grown as well, but still short and small, so Lucifer supposed her vessel (whatever that might be) was in a permanent adolescence stage.

"He thinks you're weak." He was lying on his back, head in Sariel's lap, eyes closed as Sariel stroked his blond hair.

"I'm not."

"I know," Lucifer half- smiled, and opened his eyes to see Sariel smiling down at him. He raised himself up slightly to give her a gentle kiss, then lowered back down to look up at the tree they were under.

Eden was beautiful. Tall trees made dense forests, which Lucifer and Sariel found quiet and comforting, enclosed where none could see or hear them. Animals came by often, curious of the newcomers in their domain. Many angels went down to Eden for rest from Heaven, but Lucifer found himself there most with his favorite sibling.

Then the humans came.

Lucifer hated them from the moment he looked at them invading Eden. He knew his siblings did not care for them either, but promised to love them and help keep the cockroaches away from sinning.

Lucifer wanted them to sin, something he had mentioned several times to both Sariel and Gadreel. He wanted to show the others how corruptible they were, unworthy of love or care. He wanted things to go back to how they used to be, when him and Sariel would disappear to Eden and lay under the trees. Or when him and Gadreel would talk about everything and anything.

The humans had ruined all that.

Every.

Last.

Bit.

Lucifer's solace had been destroyed, and he vowed to take revenge on the humans for that.

Sariel told him to start with the easiest, Lilith. The first woman. That had been almost too easy. All he had to do was suggest to kill Adam. Lilith's mind was darker, and when she thought she had succeeded, tried to copulate with his 'corpse'. Lucifer was not found out or punished for his role, since Sariel insisted he was with her at the time. Lilith, on the other hand, was sent to Father's newly created domain- Hell. It was a dark place, full of flames and chains, a eternal dungeon for wrong-doers.

This victory had not settled the anger in Lucifer, because Father created a new woman, from Adam, that was more docile and submissive. So Lucifer devised another plan: Have them eat from the Tree of Knowledge. Maybe then his Father would see how disloyal and flawed they were, maybe then he'd remove them and order would be returned. He glazed over the thought in suggestions to Gadreel, and told Sariel out right when he thought they were alone. He failed to notice Metatron slinking around.

\------

"My Son," Father's voice was deeply disappointed. Lucifer was standing in the light of his Father's throne room, his siblings around him. Michael was standing behind Father, looking down at Lucifer in shock. Lucifer stared at the ground in a mock act of shame. "My Son, why can you not love my children?"

"I love my Angelic brothers and sisters." Lucifer replied casually.

"Why not my human children?"

"They are broken, flawed abortions." He growled out, and Michael leaped at him, throwing him to the ground and punching hard. Lucifer raised his arms to fight back, but the Michael was hitting too hard and fast. There was a scuffle of noise, and the blows stopped, then there was a loud thump. Lucifer opened his eyes to see Sariel standing near, Michael in a heap against the wall.

"That. Is. My. Brother." Sariel snarled, and Michael slowly stood to glare at her, but said nothing.

Father stared at them, then calmly informed: "Lucifer and Sariel. Your fate will be decided tomorrow." The two archangels turned away from Father and walked out.

Lucifer did not see Gabriel anywhere.

\---------

"Lucifer?" Sariel moved from next to him to straddle his lap, and Lucifer tilted his head at her.

"Yes?" He brushed back a wayward lock of hair from Sariel's face, and she leaned closer to him, putting her hands on his chest.

"Do you think Father will keep us together?" Lucifer had a sinking feeling she was going to ask that. He was worried, but decided to calm his sister, smiling at her.

"Surely he is not that cruel." He kissed her softly, wrapping his arms around her.

But he was.

Lucifer was thrown into Hell by Michael, into The Cage.

His last memories were of Sariel screaming his name as she was dragged into Heaven's dungeons, of Gabriel's tear-stained cheeks but dry eyes, and Michael's words to him before he tossed him away: "You. Are. A. Monster."

 


	2. Regret: Gadreel

Gadreel made mistakes easily and often. Michael always scolded him when such things happened, but mostly when Gadreel pulled on Raphael's wings. Although Gadreel would apologize, he did not mean it. No one liked Raphael (expect Micheal and even then it was dubious). Raphael was mean and spiteful and a bully. And Michael was always angry about something.

Lucifer never scolded him, so the little fledgling gravitated to him. When he did something wrong, Lucifer only shake his head, sigh, and murmur: "Oh Gadreel,"

Gabriel, always in Lucifer's shadow, would grin wide and giggle. "'illy Gaddy!" Gabriel's speech impediment was quite amusing, so Gadreel teased him a little bit for it.

Gadreel often preferred to be alone; however, away from everyone and everything, so he disappeared to a secluded glen in Eden, under the shade of the trees.

Which was where he was now, twisting and smashing a cloud he grabbed on his descent. He molded and crafted the malleable water, until he made something new.

Something new.

Not good.

Father was The Creator, not him. He shouldn't create.

It was an odd thing though, like a hairless, upright monkey. It looked at Gadreel with clear eyes, full of wonder. Gadreel sat it down and it walked on it's hind legs, head help up high.

"Gaddy?" Gadreel jumped when he heard Gabriel's voice.

"Ga- Gabriel!" He did something wrong. He was going to get punished or scolded. He didn't want Michael to hit him like he hit Lucifer.

"What's t'at?" Gadreel grabbed the cloud and smashed it.

"N-Nothing," He stuttered out. "Don't tell Michael, Gabriel! Don't tell Michael or Lucifer!" Even Lucifer would be upset at him for doing the forbidden: creation. Gabriel stared at him for a long moment before slowly dipping his head in agreement. "Promise, Gabriel! Promise me!"

"I pro-miss,"

"Thank you Gabriel,"

"O' c'urse, Gaddy!" Gabriel grinned and walked away, throwing his brother a wave over his shoulder. Gadreel waved back and started making leaf piles, quickly forgetting his mistake.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

When Sariel came into being, Gabriel shunned himself from everyone. Gadreel was not sure of the reason, but he did not want to intrude and be scolded for it.

Gadreel also found it odd that, instead Sariel becoming Lucifer shadow, it was the other way around. Lucifer constantly followed the new fledgling, worrying about her. Gadreel could see why. She was worrying: Too curious, too aggressive, too quiet. She scared him. It scared him more to see how devoted Lucifer was to her.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

Gadreel was shocked when Father created the humans. He sent back to a half- forgotten memory of a cloud- man, now flesh and blood. And like that cloud-person, he hated them from first sight. Lucifer was absolutely enraged that Eden, where he and Sariel often went, was overrun by "The Abortions".

Despite his disdain for mankind, Gadreel was slightly intrigued by them. They were so curious about everything, yet so, so, so afraid.

They feared God, a respectful fear, like that Gadreel had for Michael. Lucifer, though, terrified them. The angel's broodiness and vehement anger made Adam and Eve avoid them at all costs. Scared as they were of Lucifer, the people were only mildly wary of his closest sibling. Sariel's appearance was too unassuming and her soft- cruel- smile drew them in. Her and Lucifer combined was enough to make even Metatron cautious of them.

Gadreel, as much as he hated the people, did not wish them harm. Physical at least.

Lucifer did.

He whispered a plan to Gadreel in hushed tones, of how he was going to bring the humans down. He must have told Sariel as well, because Metatron mentioned her as well.

Gadreel remembered the trial.

The punishment.

Lucifer had fallen, Sariel in Heaven's dungeons.

Gadreel was alone.

But it was the humans. They did this. Ruined the order, as Lucifer often said. And Gadreel wanted revenge. Make them sin. Get rid of them. Gadreel was determined to succeed where his brother had failed.

After all, how could a Son of Fire bow down to a Son of Clay?

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

Eve was awake, staring at the Tree of Knowledge with ignorant wonder, her head tilted and brow furrowed. Gadreel, disguising himself in the form of a snake, slid closer so he was able to whisper to the woman.

"This fruit," He hissed. "Does it not look delicious," Eve looked moderately surprised to hear a snake talking, but brushed it off.

"It is forbidden, Serpent,"

"Why?" The woman stopped to think.

"Because we shall die if we eat from it," Already the had devolved their fear of Death. How quaint.

"Your eyes will be opened. You will shall not perish, for you will be like God," Gadreel slithered closer, and if he was in his regular form, he;d smirk. Eve paused and Gadreel could sense her conflicted thoughts. She finally reached out with a trembling hand and plucked a fruit from the branch.

"Eve," Adam called and she turned to him. "Mine of my ribs, what are you doing? Do you wish to die?" He loved her, his eyes and voice worried. Eve shook her head and took a small morsel of the fruit. Adam stared at her.

  
"We will become like God, Adam," His eyes widened at that, and Gadreel knew he would do the same as his mate. Adam gingerly took it from her, and nibbled on it. As soon as they swallowed, their eyes were indeed opened, colors changing from a muddy brown to a clear chestnut. The scurried away from each other, frightened, and Gadreel went away as well.

A badger lifted his nose from the hole he was digging close by and chuckled.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

"Gadreel," Father's voice was harsh, not sad as with Lucifer. Gadreel was not Favorited. He did not shy away from his father's anger, only looked down. "Have you too forsaken my children?" Gadreel did not move, did not speak. "Answer me,"

"I told the Woman to eat from the Tree of Knowledge, saying her eyes would be opened," He said proudly, and Michael glared down at him.

"My son," God's voice was now weary, disappointed. "Why did you convince them to sin?"

"They would have ate without my intervention. I simply guided them further,"

"You filthy liar!" Michael yelled, his wings fluttering angrily, but God hushed him.

"Why, Gadreel?"

"A Son of Fire cannot bow down to a Son of Clay," Gadreel raised his head up, his manner reflecting dignity in every way. Even Metatron stared at him in silence at his statement. God slowly blinked.

"Dungeons,"

So that was were he stayed for years.

All that accompanied him there were Sariel's distant cries.

And a new feeling was forming in Gadreel's chest.

Dark.

Heavy.

"I wish to go back," He murmured suddenly one day. Metatron looked up from his writing and chuckled.

"I bet you do,"

 

 


	3. Loss: Gabriel

Gabriel was a contradiction. He was amicable and talkative, but also fiercely secretive, wanting to know everything about everyone, but not wanting anyone to know anything about him.

That was one of the many reasons he loved Lucifer. He answered all of Gabriel's questions but asked none of his own. Lucifer, although more temperamental, was kinder and less aggressive than his twin brother, Michael. Lucifer, if able to, would settle arguments with words, but Michael was more prone to use his fists than his tongue. Because of this, the brothers fought plenty and often. Gabriel did not like it.

Gabriel also thought Raphael was a perfect fit for being Michael's charge, both were rough and ruthless; Raphael was a big bully, for he always teased Gabriel about his speech impediment. Gabriel hated how his mouth refused to say things correctly, and he disliked Raphael for pointing it out.

Lucifer never teased him, only corrected him with a shake of his head and a kind smile.

And Gabriel idolized him. The brightest, most beautiful Archangel who was soft and kind and helpful to everyone. How could one not adore him? Lucifer seemed to truly love Gabriel, bringing him clouds to play with and letting the little fledgling sit in his lap and ruffle his sandy hair.

///

Gabriel was sitting in Lucifer's lap, back against his chest, a cloud in his hands. Lucifer put his chin on Gabriel's head, watching him.

"Luci?"

"Yes, Gabriel?"

"I 'ate Meaton,"

"Hate Metatron,"

"T'ats what I said," Gabriel turned to look at him.

"Met-" Lucifer signaled for repetition.

"Met,"

"A-"

"A,"

"Tron,"

"Tron,"

"Now put it all together," Gabriel thought for a moment, scrunching his nose.

"Meatatron,"

"Close enough," Lucifer sighed. "Gabriel, when will you learn to speak correctly?"

"I know how to t'ay it, but my tongue is to lon'," Gabriel insisted, pouting.

"Then maybe we should cut a piece off," Lucifer grinned mischievously, and Gabriel tried to wiggle out of his arms.

"No! No! Luci!" He giggled, and Lucifer tried to open his mouth wide, gently pulling on his jaw. "No! Lucipher!" Lucifer chuckled and gave Gabriel's brown-blond hair a soft tug.

"As you wish," Gabriel laughed and mused his brother's spiky hair.

////

Gabriel was not fond of many other angels, but liked Gadreel. He would have liked him more if he was not such a quiet loner, but still tolerated him because Gadreel felt the same about Lucifer as him. And, although Gadreel stuck with them quite a bit, Lucifer would Gabriel a wink and small smirk to show him that he was the Morning Star's favorite. Gabriel was ecstatic to be Lucifer's favorite, and, being so, Lucifer taught him magic: How to make things seem to be or actually exist for a while. Make objects appear out of thin air. Or, his favorite, even if he was not very good at it, make people think he was in front of them when he was really behind them. He loved the power, the abilities. He could play jokes on his siblings, and was able to play with them. He wasn't the baby anymore.

Especially when Sariel was created. She, the rare girl, was the new highlight. Gabriel was a 'teen' when she came along, and he did not like her. She was too odd.

Too quiet.

Too cunning.

Too sweet.

Too angry.

She was always looking for a fight where there was none.

And Lucifer doted on her. He absolutely adored her. Gabriel remembered when Lucifer did that with him. He wasn't jealous, though. Never jealous.

He was worried.

Sariel scared Gabriel. He was terrified of what she was going to do with Lucifer.

So Gabriel isolated himself. He couldn't watch Lucifer change, so he buried himself in magic, perfecting it, making it the best he could.

The Pagans.

The Pagans had given the planet to Father, a secret only the archangels knew and they were sworn to secrecy about. Gabriel wanted to join them, to sneak into their ranks. He had even planned a name for himself: Loki. A trickster God.

And he would escape.

No more fighting.

No more arguing.

No more worrying about how badly someone was going to hurt someone else.

No more.

Just freedom.

Pure freedom to do what he wanted when he wanted. He did not know when he would run away, but he knew he had to. He had to escape.

Sometimes, albeit rarely, he'd join his siblings. It usually ended as it always did: Bloody. Through Sariel. Even as a fledgling, she had broken Metatron's wings multiple times, and several had left Michael bloody and bruised. The only time Lucifer had scolded her for it was when she almost broke Gabriel's jaw, and he bit off part of his tongue. Lucifer had lost control, yelling and screaming at her until she cried. But Lucifer ignored her, choosing to patch up Gabriel. He was able to heal everything but his tongue.

"Thank you, Lucifer," The older Archangel stared at Gabriel for a long moment before murmuring:

"That is the first time you've ever said my name correctly," So Gabriel supposed that was the only good thing to come from Sariel.

But his brother had changed.

Especially when the humans came.

He was brooding, dark, and vicious, lashing out at everyone expect for Sariel, and sometimes Gadreel and Gabriel.

Lucifer was cruel. He wanted nothing more than for the humans to die, disintegrate, fall back to the dust from whence they came. Adam and Eve were extremely frightened of him, but were unwary of his constant companion, Sariel. Her appearance was too unassuming. But Lucifer was not. One could taste the anger off of him, the darkness boiling in his blood.

Gabriel liked the humans. They were peaceful, quiet. They loved and cared in ways he had never seen.

Gabriel never saw Lilith. He had been a hermit before Eve. The Archangel, now fully- grown, had heard much about the very first woman, and he suspected Sariel. Lucifer would never do that, make a demon, he simply wouldn't. He would get over his hatred, right?

Right?

_Right?_

**Right?**

 

 

 

Wrong.

Metatron had overheard Lucifer's plan to destroy. Sariel was an accomplice. Father was going to study their sins, to see what they deserved.

Gabriel couldn't attend the trial. He simply could not do it. The pain was too much.   
Gabriel learned the darkest, hardest, most brutal pain of loving: Losing.

He cried until he had no more tears to shed, then gagged and hacked, dryly weeping, remembering the brightest archangel, his brother, the one who raised him, the kindest of all.

He did not know the blond angel with eyes burning like dry ice, the one Michael threw down, the one Sariel screamed for, the one that called Gabriel brother, the one whose wings burned from white to red and black.

That was not the brother he knew.

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

Years passed, and when Gabriel was about to disappear to Earth, Father approached him. He had been creating many new angels, but he had two he wanted Gabriel to rear. One was blond with blue- gray eyes and an odd voice named Balthazar. The other was black- haired Castiel with blue eyes as bright as Heaven itself.

And Gabriel vowed to be the best damn brother he could ever be to them.


	4. Loyalty: Balthazar

Balthazar had created strong bonds very young. He almost never left his little brother's side, defending him against Rapheal and Metatron. He even got upset if Gabriel came too close to Castiel.

Protective, said some.

Parental, murmured others.

Possessive, some even used.

But Gabriel, who knew him better than he knew himself sometimes, insisted he was loyal. When Balthazar put his arms around his little brother defensively, and growl at anyone how came nearer than he liked, Gabriel would chuckle and kneel down at eye- level, whispering softly:

"It's alright, Balthy, see?" He'd stroke Castiel's thick hair gently, barely touching him. "I'm not gonna hurt Cassie. I'm not gonna hurt him," Balthazar watched him carefully, then slowly let go. Gabriel would scoop Castiel into his arms, letting Balthazar climb onto the Archangel's back, still uneasy and watchful. Gabriel was the only one Balthazar would let touch Castiel.

But Balthazar was as talkative as Castiel was quiet. Everyone teased him about his odd accent, though Balthazar knew Gabriel and Castiel never meant it meanly. Balthazar wasn't fond of his voice, the way some words slurred, the pronunciation was off, and his voice in general was different, the lit and dialect was clipped and quick. Gabriel tried to assure him by telling him that he also had a speech impediment, but Balthazar had no hope of losing his strangeness; his voice was just too weird.

Castiel liked listening to him talk; however, so Balthazar would lead one- sided conversation with him, where he'd talk about whatever topic Castiel happened to bring up, sometimes intergecting with a: "Well, Cassie, what do you think?" In an almost sarcastic tone, knowing Castiel would only shrug and look at his older brother with his wise blue eyes.

Balthazar's sassiness made him unpopular with his other siblings. His sarcasm was cutting, quick to give back a witty retort to anyone, even to Castiel.

But he was sweeter with Castiel. He smiled and laughed at and with him, calling him Cas and Cassie. And, in the end, he decided he liked Gabriel. He was sweet, kind, and good with Castiel, which was the most important thing to Balthazar. Gabriel grinned and chuckled often, though sometimes, he'd give Balthazar an odd look, his eyes sad. Whenever the young angel asked him about it, Gabriel would only shake his head and laugh, pick him up and swing him around, setting him on his shoulders to make him giggle, responding simply with: "You just remind me of someone, Balthy,". Balthazar often wondered who Gabriel spoke of. Micheal seemed to think the same as the other archangel, always angry and wanting to fight Balthazar until Gabriel steeped in: "Michael. His name is Balthazar," The eldest archangel would swallows and turn away, his head held high with pride. Balthazar and Castiel fought, but it was all just play.

Castiel tossed his brother to the ground, straddling him and slapping his face. Balthazar could have thrown him off, but he let the other angel hit him until a fist came in contact with his cheekbone.

"Cas! Cassie!" Balthazar yelled, and Castiel immediately moved away. "Father, Cas. One of these days, you're going to kill me," He murmured jokingly, rubbing his face. Castiel's eyes widened and he talked the blond in a massive hug, wrapping him tightly in tan arms and black wings.

"No! No, Balthazar! I would never, ever, ever kill you," Balthazar chuckled and ruffled Castiel's thick raven hair.

"I know,"

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

Castiel hated Balthazar's company when they became teens. The blond, more knowledgeable of himself and others, simply pretended he didn't care as much as he did, and only Gabriel was able to see through his act. The Archangel could look past the outward cockiness and nonchalance to see the pain in his eyes when Castiel pushed him away with a frown and a dark look.

So Balthazar watched the humans instead. He learned his voice was something called 'British', and that the words he thought he made up was part of 'French'. Balthazar analyzed the humans with wide eyes and an open mind. He was fascinated by thier odd ways, and how easily corruptable they were, yet how hard they tried to avoid it, and still shamed others for some sins and praised some for others. They were obsessed with flaws: thier own, others, everything else's. They were also terrified of someone they called the Devil. Balthazar heard the fallen angel called by many names: Satan, the Evil One, the Great Tempter, Beelzebub, Azazel, and Lucifer. Balthazar didn't think he existed. A person couldn't be that angry, that bent on vengance. But maybe there was such one. Gabriel always avoided the question when it was put to him.

The humans were also very... Lewd. Gabriel said dirty, but Balthazar did not see anything dirty about it, unless it was without consent in any way. Otherwise, it was beautiful. The love and lust and desire all rolled into something wonderfully free and... Human.   
It was incredibly intimate, and it fascinated him. He wondered what it was like, and he spent hours watching humans have sex, a desire to have an encounter of his own growing in him.

But he was afraid.

Afraid of being found out.

What if it was bad?

What if he was put in the dungeons for it?

So he just watched until he became sick of it, of staring down, of wondering.

In human years, it was 1560, during the Elizabethan Age. Balthazar was fully grown, Gabriel had long since gone, and Castiel no longer frantized him. So, when a blond caught his eye, he appeared to her in his vessel, a pastor, and he had his first- glorious- amazing- heavenly- time.

Since that experience, Balthazar both retainted his vessel and dived head- first into the world of sex.

He tried everything: men, women, other genders, various fetishes and kinks, orgies. If someone even remotely sexual was waiting to happen, he was there, eager to be a part of this fascinating aspect of human life.

Other angels; however, were not pleased with his wildness. They said he was corrupted, twisted for vying for something so dirty, so intimate, so... Human.

Balthazar, frankly, didn't give a fuck what they thought. He was enjoying himself, having fun after a long stretch of order and boredom. So he kept up his free lifestyle with a glass of whiskey and a smirk for hundreds of years.

Then came War.

After the Apocalypse was averted by the Winchesters, war broke out in Heaven over who should lead now that Micheal was gone.

Castiel came to him, desperate:

"Balthazar, brother, I need you," Balthazar stared at his brother, drinking in his words. He needed him. Needed.

"Why?" He already knew he would help, but for what reason?

"Raphael is beating me. He wishes to become the new God. I cannot allow it. I need soldiers. Balthazar, please," There was a silence. Balthazar sighed.

"Balthazar. We were children together," Castiel pleaded. With that, Balthazar donned the armor he wished he never had.

And so he fought.

And so he killed.

And so he hated.

Hated the blood.

Hated the war.

Hated the loyalty.

His fierce love and loyalty for his brother. How he fought for him. Killed for him. Let him freedom die for him.

The Angel who deserted him.

Deserted?

No.

He grew up.

And left all remnants of his childhood behind. Which included Balthazar.

Yet, the British angel forgave him. What else could he do? They were brothers, he loved him, even if his view of him was tainted.

But he simply could not continue this bloodshed. He couldn't.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

He moved slowly, carefully, his hands twitching. He opened his bag wide, then grabbed everything he could. Staff of Moses. The Holy Grail. David's slingshot. If he touched it, it when into the bag. _What would Castiel think?_ The question entered his mind, but he pushed it aside to grab Joshua's horn.

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

A great battle was going on, and Balthazar hacked his way off the field, then cut his arm, spilling blood. He took off some off his armor and his sword. leaving it a mess. He created a vision of wings on the ground, then disappeared to Earth. _What would Cas do?_ He thought. Nothing. Was the answer. He didn't care.

No one did.

None would miss him.

Then what was that feeling of guilt his chest? Castiel may not of deserted Balthazar, but Balthazar deserted Castiel.

How could he do that to his own brother?

How could he leave the only he ever truly cared about? The only sibling he ever truly loved?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, guys, this might be the last chapter for a bit- I'm working on the next one which is Cas, okay? Love ya, and Thank you for this.


End file.
